By Kristin Bonham
My family is experiencing some major growth this fall! Two of my girls, Taylor and Katy are having babies 5 weeks apart, my daughter Taylor and her family moved in with Chris and I so they can renovate a new house, and my daughter Abby is getting married in a few months.
At the same time, I had 2 major projects at work getting ready to launch. I was running from one thing to the next, changing roles and hats minute to minute. My task lists were everywhere and emails were tough to keep up with.
Like many of you, I have become used to juggling crazy loads and functioning at full capacity. It has been a great accomplishment to be able to handle a lot and somewhat manage my stress. What I learned a few weeks ago, is that if I am at full capacity, I have nothing to draw from when life throws a curve ball.
I was preparing to leave for A Beautiful Weekend and Taylor mentioned that her 4 day-old baby, Reese had a fever. When the triage nurse told us she would be staying in the hospital for 3 days minimum, we both started crying. After lots of tears, I helped get them get settled, packed my car and headed out to the ladies retreat.
I woke up the next morning at 5:45am and thought, ‘if I jump in the car right now, I can be at the hospital by 7, spend a few hours with my girls and be back in time for our team to arrive for the retreat set up.’ Everything went as planned until I got a speeding ticket on my way back to the beach.
Cue pity party. Boy was I having one! I was telling God Reese was sick, people aren’t cooperating with my timeline, I’m juggling so much, and now I got a ticket! No fair! I was a mess. I knew what I had to do that night at the retreat and was thinking, “there is no way I can even put two sentences together. I have nothing. “
My mind was racing, my thoughts were exaggerated and not going in a good direction…. And all of the sudden, I heard the Holy Spirit say, “you were speeding.”
Truth. I was speeding.
Many times we cannot choose what is happening to us or how much is happening in our lives but we can choose how we handle it. We cannot choose how someone else is acting or responding to us but we can choose how we respond. In that moment, when the Holy Spirit gave me a reality check, I knew, I had a choice. I could stay in my pity party or I could change my attitude. I could stay stuck, or let God use it.
It’s amazing what God will use when you let him. I needed His perspective, His direction and His peace. In the midst of the struggle to juggle it all, the only way I will ever have peace is through listening to Him. That is my choice.