Alexis Patterson, GFC Lutz

“Our relationships are a reflection of our personal commitment to God.” I know that is a bold statement; especially if you have a difficult relationship in your life. But, please hear me out. I married a man that has his own, but very different relationship with God. For a woman like me, who is all in with her relationship with God, sometimes it can make our union hard to navigate. We don’t always see things the same way, we may not fight the same way, and we certainly aren’t connecting with God the same way. So, how can this union reflect the relationship we should have with Him? Love fearlessly. Our goal in marriage is to be the imagery of Christ and the Church. I’ve had moments in my marriage as I’ve grown to understand more of our purpose as a couple where the enemy will try to use what God has brought to my spiritual sight against me. The enemy will try to make me feel like we will never be what God has purposed us to be. I know from experience that I am not alone in this area. I have spoken with countless women and received many prayer requests for challenges in marriage that have come from spiritual differences. When there is a recurring theme like that in my life, I’ve learned to lean in because there is most likely an assignment for me there.

Loving fearlessly means that we lead with love. It means that we no longer love based on conditions. Loving fearlessly means loving others to the life that Christ Jesus lived, died, and resurrected for us to have. I made the statement earlier that our relationships are a reflection of our commitment to God because how we love others, especially our spouses, can reveal how we relate to God. Now, I have to be honest- this concept challenges me. I am not perfect in how I give love to my husband. There are moments when I fail my husband in showing up armed and fearless for the battles we may face. Sometimes I even allow my insecurities in our lack to change the goals and vision I have for our marriage. I struggle when I feel the blows of the enemy invading our marriage with confusion, doubt, and generational curses. But, I’m writing to tell you that God is so sweet. Even in the moments when my heart and mind want to cave into every negative thought I choose to believe: 

  1. Satan can have no authority in my marriage when I choose daily to honor and surrender my husband and our marriage to God. 
  2. God’s purpose and plans for us are GOOD – and I am believing that for my marriage. He is working it out!
  3. My husband was God’s idea. He created him. He is pursuing him and longs to soften and have his heart more than I could ever want that for him.
  4. God has compassion for our struggles and uses them to build us up – Remember marriage was God’s great plan and ALL God’s plans are GOOD.

“Love does not delight in evil but rejoices in truth.” 1 Corinthians 13:6

Reflecting on these truths helps me to get back up and love fearlessly. My husband is wonderful! There is so much I love about him and we get the privilege of doing life together, raising our beautiful children, and laughing all the way through. Truly, I married my best friend. We unite on so many fronts that I can see why the enemy would be threatened. We have our weak spots and, everyday, we have to stand firm on God’s word. I’m reminded in Ephesians 6:12 that our battle is not against flesh and blood but against principalities, power and the rulers of darkness. It is not my place to change my husband’s heart, that is the role of the Holy Spirit. I am to be consistent in my own faith and unswerving in my pursuit for what God has for us. My role in our relationship is to keep praying in agreement with God’s intent for marriages over our marriage. My role is to be a beacon of light and hope for other women who share similar struggles. And, finally, my role is to love fearlessly while reflecting my personal commitment to my Lord and Savior.

If you’re reading this and you feel your marriage isn’t the banner of what a marriage should resemble – please shift your focus to God’s promise and design. You’ll see a change first in your heart and then in your marriage. Don’t be afraid to love your husband fearlessly. Don’t try to make him fit into your conditions of deserving or earning your love. Love like Jesus, be fervent in prayer, and be bold about the promises of what God can do in your lives. 


Heavenly Father, we are grateful for Your intentional design for marriage. We honor You in lifting up every man and woman that struggles to see how his/her leadership and love should resemble You. Lord, You are generous for giving us the right to relationship, first with You and then others. We ask that You touch every union brought together for Your glory. Father please strengthen every relationship and break every stronghold keeping us from growing. Our request is that we learn to lean on and trust in You and the great plans You have for our lives. You declared marriage as holy and sacred, Your promise points to that Your design for marriage is obtainable for all Your children. Every answer to Your promise is Yes and Amen. We Thank You for the movement of the Holy Spirit right now as we pray. In Jesus name, Amen.

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  1. Wow what a blessing to read this
    this morning. Your love of God
    and for your husband shows through
    In every word.
    Lean in and Trust God! 🙏❤️

    • Thank you for your encouragement Diane🙏🏽

  2. Wonderful word Alexis! We all need these reminders:)

    • Thank you Debbie, I appreciate your encouragement.

    • Thank you Debbie, I appreciate you.

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